“Slut shaming” is a term I am sure you are familiar with. According to Geek Feminism (whatever that is), slut shaming is defined as “…the act of criticizing a woman for her real or presumed sexual activity, or for behaving in ways that someone thinks are associated with her real or presumed sexual activity.” The advocates against slut shaming are of course, primarily hardcore feminists. They hold “slut walks” and talk about how oppressive a dress code is, because they should be able to wear a tube top and mini skirt to work or school. In these walks, they dress provocatively, and sometimes do not dress at all, instead choosing to walk in the nude.
The advocates for slut empowerment also draw a comparison between men who sleep around and women who sleep around. Claiming that it’s unfair that men are seen as gods or raised on high when they tame excess amounts of strange, yet when women sit on a lot of face, they are chastised and seen in a negative light. This is of course, completely accurate. Nobody sees guys who bounce from girl to girl, purely for sexual intercourse, in a negative light. These guys are all seen as awesome people and treated super well by everyone and praised for their exploits.
Just kidding, guys who sleep with hordes of women are generally seen as douchebags, even by their buddies. It’s not gender specific. Even when a guys friends say “nice” when recounting his sexual encounters with various women, they still think he’s a douchebag for using tons of women for a c*ck warmer. It’s like the “Chad’ concept, a Chad is a douche by default. Guys named Chad tend to be arrogant, rude, womanizers, etc. And the friends of a Chad, are well aware that he is, in fact, a Chad. The “nice” is more or less because sleeping with lots of women, as a straight male, takes a bit more effort than it would take for a straight woman to sleep with a lot of men.
As men, we have to charm, wow, and dazzle the female. It’s on us to do the heavy lifting most of the time. To sleep with a woman, is a reward for the work you’ve put into this woman, whether it be for 1 night, 1 month, or 1 year. For a woman, all you need is a vagina, and you will find a man to have sex with you. Any time, any day, any place. It’s not terribly difficult to find a dick to ride. This is not justification for sleeping with lots of women. These guys are still fuckasses who are taking advantage of loose women for their own sexual pleasure. But, being slut isn’t something to be accepting or appreciative of either. Tess Holliday can be a slut. Hell, the fattest woman on the planet could easily be a slut, because there are millions of guys in the world that have that as a fetish, or would do it just to say they had sexual intercourse with a Tumblr user and lived to tell the tale.
It’s all self destructive behavior. There’s a social stigma associated with being a slut, with promiscuous behavior. As there should be. It’s not good, it’s indicative of lack of values and morals, or an underlying problem. Things like depression or childhood trauma can manifest themselves through promiscuous behavior. It can also be a show of sex addiction. These are not things to glamorize and raise up as something that should just be accepted and not corrected. They should be corrected. Of course, nobody can force someone to fix themselves, the person needs to have a desire to better themselves. But creating some movement that advocates for it to be ok to be a slut is detrimental to that.
It creates an excuse for people who behave in a destructive manner, in regards to sexual conduct. “Oh, I’m just a slut, it’s who I am. I don’t care what people think.” When in reality, it could be due to some repressed memory or whatever. But if there’s nobody to tell them it’s not ok, they will never think there is an issue with their behavior, and they will never wonder why they have a need to have a ton of sex. There’s nothing illegal about being a slut, unless you’re a prostitute outside of specific regions in Nevada. It is however, dangerous to be a slut, or a stud. The risk of STD’s, HIV/AIDS, unwanted pregnancies, etc sky rockets when you are intimate with multiple partners. Obviously using condoms or birth control can help mitigate these risks. But they are only so effective, and in the case of birth control, has to be used properly. These people want some false right that doesn’t exist. The right to not be judged for having lots of sex, and for people to accept their lifestyle. Unfortunately, that would require the nation/world to break part of its collective moral compass. Or whatever is left of it anyway.
Another part of the slut movement thing, is advocacy against rape. Nobody’s FOR rape. At all. Besides rapists anyway. They talk about teaching men not to rape, as if the Joe Snuffy doesn’t know that rape is bad, and highly illegal. Men know that rape is wrong, even rapists know it is wrong. Otherwise they wouldn’t try and hide when raping someone, or after raping someone. I was never taught to rape, and I’ve never raped a woman for any reason. Unless it was in the video game trash talk sense, then I’ve raped several women, and men. Men don’t need to be taught not to rape, and it’s not slut shaming or victim blaming to think that everyone needs to know how to defend themselves properly, and be aware of their surroundings. I got into it with someone a while back, because some girl went by herself to a college party, at a frat house with a known history of rapes, and she got raped. Did she deserve it? No. Could it have been prevented? Abso-fucking-lutely. Go with friends, take a self defense class, make sure your drink doesn’t leave your sight, easy shit like that. It’s not victim blaming, these are steps to ensure that another woman doesn’t become a victim. The other idea is, DON’T GO TO A FUCKING FRAT HOUSE WITH A HISTORY OF RAPE INCIDENTS. That should have been the indicator that it’s not a good place to be.
Clothing is also in their agenda. They should get to dress however they want, right? You can’t tell them how to dress. But if you land on a moving comet, and where a shirt they don’t like, they will be right there to tell you how to dress. Calling school and work dress codes sexist because they can’t show up in panties and pasties. It’s dumb. It’s a really, really dumb thing to fight against. Dress codes are their for respect of yourself and those around you. Sure, teachers say it has something to do with not being a distraction, but ultimately, you should respect the people around you enough to not come to class/work with your beef curtains/John Dory swinging in the breeze. If you really feel the need to dress provocatively at school or work, then you have no self respect in my eyes, so why should I show you any respect?
Ultimately the movement is about respect and acceptance. They want their position to be respected, and they want to be accepted and to not have to change their self destructive lifestyle. There is nothing wrong with wanting respect or to be accepted. However, if what you advocate in and of itself lacks self respect, then why would anyone else respect you? Respect is earned, not given. The people who are judging sluts aren’t the problem, it’s the sluts themselves that create the problem. It’s a classic case of, “accept me or else.” They want respect, but refuse to show it to anyone else. I will also make it clear, this is in no way a guide for how you should live your life or conduct yourself. This is an op-ed. That’s it. An opinion. If you want to be a slut, stud, whatever, go for it. Use protection and be smart about it, but don’t expect me, or anyone else to respect or accept what you’re doing.