How to recognize a Feminist

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TRIGGER WARNING:

The images contained in this article might ruin your appetite. And your will to live.

Contemplating the topic of modern, third wave feminism and its destructive effects on society, I wondered if there are indeed physical signs that stem from adhering to such malignant doctrine. Of course, we’ve heard the phrase “Feminism is cancer”, and it certainly is an insidious disease that corrupts whoever is touched by it, turning their once rational arguments into the most brainwashed rhetoric of victimhood. Just look at Malala Yousafzai, an example of strength of character and perseverance on the face of ignorance and fear, now poisoned with the virulence of feminism after becoming friends with Emma Watson, whose “concerns about equality” include being expected to look pretty on camera because she is a movie star.

As if there wasn’t a bigger example of privilege than a white woman having enough money in the bank to take a year off from working in order to “concentrate on feminism” (even when the “intersectional feminists” don’t like her because she is white, thin and pretty).

But don’t despair dear intersectional feminists! Soon the wet fantasy of pubescent millennials will go through a monstrous transformation, and come out as transracial genderqueer otherkin with prefered pronouns fe/fi/fo/fum.

Oh, I can already envision her a year from now…

Because that’s the kind of malevolent mutation that feminism causes on women, or perhaps it is the other way around, and it’s those hag-like creatures who are attracted to feminism? Either way, as in Russian fairy tales where women who become witches grow iron teeth, hooked noses and pointy chins that meet in the middle of their faces, women in the West who become feminists undergo a dark metamorphosis as soon as they start complaining about having to shower and look presentable in public because of EVIL WHITE CIS STRAIGHT MALE PATRIARCHY COLONIALISM IMPERIALISM OPPRESSION!!!111

And just as you might have recognized a Satan-butt-licking witch by her extra nipples, these are the warning signs that you are dealing with something equally destructive and monstrous, a FEMINAZI:

Large tattoos : Because few things scream “RUG MUNCHER!” quite like sleeve tattoos. In many ancient traditions, disfiguring tattoos were crafted on warriors to scare their enemies. Well, if you see a woman covered in tattoos, RUN! If it doesn’t come with feminism, it comes with crystal meth or a Nazi fetish. I would also mention having too many piercings.

Amorphous ameba-like figures : Because being monstrously fat is BEAUTIFUL! We know you barely eat and you exercise all day, yet you are still fat because of some magical condition that violates the second law of thermodynamics.

Cat eyeglasses: Few looks say “I’m really C—ty” quite like upturning, thick framed glasses.

Red lipstick: Although harmless by itself, when presented along with these other pernicious traits, one can observe how red on their lips is an indication that their hairy snatch has teeth that will bite your dick right off, leaving their vertical smile savoring your blood, as a creature of nightmares would. Even Coco Chanel considered red lipstick and red nail polish to be quite vulgar, and  an undesirable trait among women.

Out of control body hair: Unless you are a sexy Italian woman from the 1960’s, such as Sophia Loren, un-groomed body hair (armpits, pubic area, legs, FACIAL) is an indication you just don’t give a fuck anymore, and you are OK with turning into a werewolf. And most likely your testosterone levels are rising due to all that anger and aggression, turning you into a he-she-it beastly thing. Here’s the deal, body hair on men is an indication of masculinity, while body hair on a woman is also an indication of masculinity, and more than that, “toxic” masculinity.

Unnatural hair colors: What started as a sign of rebellion among dissatisfied young girls in the late 70’s and early 80’s, exemplified by films such as “Ladies and Gentlemen, the Fabulous Stains”, where the protagonist dyes her hair skunk style, and wears outrageous makeup and see through blouses to be anti-establishment, anti PC, anti safe spaces, I’m woman hear me ROAR, etc.

Has turned into special snowflakes thinking they are unicorns, mermaids and fairies kin, so they must have all kinds of “magical” hair colors.

Now, if you are a performer, that can be a pretty cool and even attractive look on you, but chances are if you are a pop or rock performer you still care about what you look like on stage and on camera.

Still, beware of basic pop bitches with unnatural hair colors; nature itself uses unnatural, vivid pigments (such as blue) to signal poison and imminent danger, in a phenomenon known as Aposematism (from Greek ἀπό apo away, σ̑ημα sema sign).

And in the case of a blue haired basic bitch you might not get directly poisoned, but you might get slapped with false rape accusations.

The most repulsive of the signs, Unnaturally colored body hair: This is peak lunacy for a feminazi, besides a herpes covered muff, few things are as grotesque as blue armpit/pubic hair.

And there you have them, if you see a woman with these traits, you can be certain she has surrendered herself to the heart of darkness, LMAO! And just as in ancient times destructive, disfigured women who enjoyed killing unborn children, and covering themselves in menstrual blood while undermining civilization were referred to as witches, nowadays we call those monstrous beings…feminists.

And if I had to give a summary of Feminism in a single image it would be this:

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