We here at Age of Shitlords enjoy getting into the spirit of the holidays. As I’m sure you are aware, today is Valentine’s Day! A day where lovers connect and celebrate, gifts are exchanged, confectioneries are given, and you try not to fuck up too badly. These traditions date back to 18th century England, when courtship was still a thing. Now, in honor of Valentine’s Day and Saint Valentine himself, enjoy a story of love and loss. A modern day Romeo and Juliet if you will. Except this time, Juliet is a little slut, and Romeo gets cucked by the bull that is Montague. Enjoy!
Shout-out to Imgur user 0bdebd7e for capturing and compiling this.
Warning: This is 4chan; expect some explicit language.
As you can see, things don’t start out well for our Romeo in this story. His love has fornicated lustily with our hero’s father, unbeknownst to him. However, with his fathers phone at home, our protagonist decides to do some snooping! And that’s when he found the text messages! His Juliet sending nudes, his father speaking sexually, both of them reminiscing about a previous sexual encounter! How will he respond!? He seeks the aid of 4chan to guide him in this troubling time.
Romeo has already delved deeper into his cuckoldry. He exclaims, “He’s been through a lot.” Making excuses, our hero shows his weak resolve. His guides have called him out on this, laughing, telling him to kill them both. He proceeds to message the whore on Facebook, desperately trying to find answers.
He continues his weak approach by asking vague questions instead of directly confronting her. It is not until a few messages in that Romeo decides to share his findings with the harlot. Of course, she knows exactly what he is talking about, hence her panic and constant worry of why he wont answer.
Again, the oracles of 4chan attempt to coax Romeo into vengeance, to give into hates wonderful embrace. However, our hero remains calm, and asks how to respond to her messages.
“It was an accident and he pressured me lots.” Ah, the common echo of a whore that has been caught. Juliet has been exposed, yet she can’t admit that she willingly allowed her lover’s father to penetrate her. Of course not. That wouldn’t be ladylike at all! She accidentally slipped onto his penis after she was coaxed into the situation. That seems plausible! Forget the mutual amorous texts! Notice the continued panic, like a calf separated from its mother before the slaughter. Whatever will our hero say!?
Again, we see the encouragement of vengeance, though now in the form of sending the evidence to her family and ruining her reputation. We also see one anon point out her rape claim as an excuse. Then, we see one anon call this what it is. Romeo getting cucked by his father. Our hero returns with more Facebook messages
THE WENCH! She continues with the excuses. How it meant nothing, she truly loves Romeo, his father was the real bad guy and she just gave in. POPPYCOCK! As we all know by now, the harlot has no resolve, just like our hero, and she also lacks respect for Romeo and his mother. She tries to avoid talking about details; she doesn’t want to incriminate herself any further. She tells him not to get angry, that they could talk about it but then reverts blame onto him, as if Romeo has committed the atrocity himself! She even attempts the Kanye West defense, “What can I do?” Not once, but twice! Again, she tries to put the blame anywhere but on herself. Of course, this is not her fault.
He is again told that he needs to murder the whore and that it’s the only option, yet he continues to slug about, merely committing to a Facebook battle, where winning is like beating someone with cerebral palsy in mini golf.
She continues to minimize her deeds, as though only once is not so bad, or that it wasn’t the same as with Romeo, so it’s not that horrible. She is still fixated on trying to call our hero!
More and more anons begin to exclaim their support of death to the witch. One points out the stupidity of what Juliet has written. Romeo them decides it is time to confront his dad, this only took him far too long. Will he grow a pair and stand up? Or will he simply go for the Facebook victory?
We see his father types like a young child, which for a grown man is unfortunate. Romeo’s father, just like Juliet, victimizes himself, attempting to make Romeo feel like the bad guy in this. He says they can’t change what happened, so they should just move on. His wife has given him another chance, so his son should cut him some slack for taking a slice of his pie. He too, wants to speak with Romeo on the phone.
At this point, anons are raging at Romeo, telling him to kill his entire family along with the girl. We also see that his father is a bald, old man. Romeo says he will kill his father, but does he have the fortitude to get it done?
ROMEO HAS BEEN PUT ON THE DEFENSIVE! His fathers plans have changed, and he now takes an offensive approach, calling his son pathetic and ordering him around. Hardly what you would expect from an apologetic father who slept with his son’s girlfriend.
Revenge! Cries of revenge are echoed throughout the thread, yet they seem to fall on deaf ears. And now, his father and Juliet are meeting up?
HATH HE NO SHAME!? The man is going to cuck his son YET AGAIN! And how does Romeo respond? “Fucking don’t. wtf” Shameful, to say the least
The thread calls him out as the weak cuck that he is. His resolve is gone, he has no dignity. It is truly a pathetic sight. He messages Juliet again, maybe to accomplish something?
Since Romeo won’t answer her, she feels it would be a good idea to meet with his father, whom she has already slept with. Romeo shows the first signs of true fire, but it’s on Facebook, and too late, so it doesn’t really matter.
And finally, we find out that his father and the harlot are staying at a hotel together that night. No doubt to continue their forbidden love at the expense of this man’s son.
In closing, this shit is fucked. Not just that this guy banged his son’s girlfriend, and when confronted turns it around on his son. But that his son didn’t take actual action. He just argued on Facebook, which ultimately ended badly for him. As a married man, I would have gone up to my father and broken my hands on his face, then kept going. Not sure what I’d do with my wife, but it would be probably end with public humiliation. Based on the thread, the OP did nothing of actual value to try to uncuck himself. Instead, he just got cucked again, but this time he knows about it. This is a sad situation in every facet. It’s somewhat comedic, purely because of how absurd it is. Don’t get cucked this Valentine’s Day everyone, stay frosty!
Here’s the vocaroo, so you can listen to her “sorry” and “regretful” voice.